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Weird Phone Call
So last night after I put the new stuff in the bathroom and separated the old stuff into throw-away and give-to-charity-shop, and while I'm reading the rice cooker manual (good oatmeal this morning!), the phone rings. I answer it and in a light soft slurred, almost lisping tone is unmistakably my father's voice. He says "Hey, this is your brother." I argue with him for about a minute that he is not my brother. Then he says to let that go and starts talking about my stepmother and her son & his family bringing him and coming up to visit and I'm ready to say no until he starts mentioning places -- Oak Harbor, Olympic Peninsula, a trip to Portland to see Lisa and her kids -- and I interrupt and say "I don't live in Seattle." So we argue for another minute that I don't live in Seattle. Finally, he says "Where do you live?" and I say "Virginia" and we argue about that. Then he asks who he's talking to. I say "Your daughter," and it turns out he thought he had called and was talking to his sister Geri all this time.
This makes me feel a bit less weird until he seriously starts arguing, knowing who I am, that I don't live in Virginia. He gives up on that and says his brain doesn't work and I tell him I know that. I didn't tell him mine wasn't working as well as usual. I tell him I heard about a patch for Parkinson's that keeps people from shaking as much, and then I tell him about Brian Stableford's story in the new Asimov's -- I'll rot13 this for spoilers:
N qbpgbe vf qbvat n fghql ba n zbabpybany nagvobql gung jvyy pyrne bhg gur cebgrvaf gung xrrc Nymurvzre'f cngvragf sebz erzrzorevat guvatf. N fcrpvny cngvrag ernpgf jryy naq trgf n frpbaq qbfr gung pyrnef bhg nyy uvf byq zrzbevrf, fubjvat uvz rirelguvat ubeevoyr ur rire qvq va uvf yvsr.
But Dad didn't get the moral of the story nor the import to his history. Oh well. He probably called Geri next and claimed to be her father.