Marilee J. Layman (mjlayman) wrote,
Marilee J. Layman

This journal has been placed in memorial status. New entries cannot be posted to it.


The book I finished on Wednesday is written about NDEs (Near Death Experiences). I had one of my own and had posted about it twice, but a long time ago. I spent way too much time Thursday looking for it online, so I'll just tell you about it.

I had my first renal (kidney failure) in 1987 and a big stroke -- six weeks of coma -- while I was in the hospital. When I got out, I got a first-job-doctor as my nephrologist and she went with what her books said. I was okay in 1988, but in May of 1989, I started feeling strange and sure it was my kidneys again. She told me I'd have elevated tests for the rest of my life (which I haven't always, it turns out) but that was it. Eventually she said I was psychogenic and none of my other doctors would talk to me about my kidneys.

I gained more and more water weight -- we think about 300 pounds at the end -- and my primary doctor put me in the hospital the day before Christmas Eve. If you walk on feet that are as big as giant loaves of bread, you'll permanently damage the tissue. My nephrologist got sick herself in February 1990 and I got a new one -- older, more experienced, willing to try things -- he had me tell him how I felt, then asked me questions, and ordered tests I'd never had before. It turned out I had a second, completely different kind of renal failure. That may not be in the books, but it wouldn't have hurt her to do the tests for what I was saying.

It was an autoimmune renal failure and I was very close to dying. He started me on the normal treatment to try and slow it down, and he called all over the country and the world to find something that might work. I had a DNR (do not resuscitate -- of the people revived in a hospital, only 5% actually live to leave) and one of the nurses was a Christian and kept trying to convert me. She'd drop by several times while she was on and one day, she found me without breathing or heart beating. She stayed and cried and prayed, and then I woke up. I told her about the NDE (below) and she said it was her value. I don't think so.

He found a study in Germany that was using cyclosporin for lupus, and it didn't work. He thought I should try it and it did work -- all that water whooshed off! I still have multiple renal failures, though.

I was on a sear, flat bit of land -- weary and worn, tired and torn -- and was standing at the edge of a cliff. I couldn't see the bottom, the sides, or the opposite side. While I was standing there, an angel flew across (and landed like Superman) and said "Do not worry: when the time comes, I'll carry you over." And I woke up.
Tags: nde

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