"I knew it was coming, and I was thinking, 'I hope it's someone I know.' I was running through names -- it'll be Lindsay, it'll be Riley -- and then I heard my name, and I didn't believe it. I sat there for a few seconds, and someone was telling me to go up there."
and I remembered the time that happened to me. In my senior year of high school, I had no doubt I'd make regional chorus, but during regional chorus, a friend and I were both up for state chorus. I had figured that we both might make it, we both might not make it, or she might make it. So I was sitting in the balcony of the theatre with my friend Kenny listening to the four alto names being called and when they called the third name and it wasn't hers, I slumped back. I didn't make it. Then Kenny was pounding me on the shoulder -- I'd made it! I had to get downstairs and up on stage! And then at state chorus, I made alto soloist. Kenny and his folks came all the way from Virginia Beach to Blacksburg so I'd have someone there to support me. (In hindsight, this was his folks trying to make up for mine -- Kenny and I were not only just friends, he was gay.) And after the solo, his mother gently told me that I had let the other alto from our school talk me into doubting myself and I should always remember this. I've tried.
I walked down to get the van today -- I remembered that one of my neighbors put in hand rails for the stairs at the other end of my building, so I could lean on those and rest and then rest on the clusterboxes (and re-tie my left shoe) and then out to the van. I brought it back in and loaded it with the recycling and took that up to the recycling bins I use. I then went to Petsmart because a vet I know said I should look for canned food with the highest proportion of protein for the cats. I've been giving them Giant's Companion brand, a 5.5 ounce can that is three for $.89 and has 11% crude protein. I went through all the 5.5oz cans at Petsmart and the only one that was higher than 7% was Science Diet, which had 11% crude protein and was $1.69 per can. This was not a hard decision. I left Petsmart with only memories of the kitties they have to adopt (all tuxedos for some odd reason) and went to have lunch at Olive Garden. I had the chicken and gnocchi and then the Berries and Zabione dessert without the zabione because I don't like it. So it was sorbet with strawberries and blueberries. Very good.
I stopped at Giant on the way home and bought enough cans of Companion to get through to the next grocery trip and I bought another bottle of Systane eye drops. The opthalmologist said the Systane is thicker than what I'd been using and might be blurry at first, but wouldn't last as long. For me, it's been lasting longer. I haven't had any eye pain since I started using it. It does blur for about four minutes, but that's okay. The problem was that I dropped the cap when I used the drops last night and it must have rolled under the headboard, which is too much moving, so I had to throw the bottle out. Then I came home to find a note in my door knocker that they're topping our section Monday and we have to be out at 8am.
Power went out again last night from 12:30-1:30am and I called and asked. She pinpointed where I was within a half-block and said they were still working on the line that was damaged yesterday and had to turn it off to finish it. When I got home today, Luke told me the power had been out for 30-40 minutes while I was out. So I've reset channels and time for TV & peripherals three times in two days! I found out last night that the two sections we're divided into for topping are also on different power lines. Only this lower section was out last night.
I've been having some trouble the last couple of weeks with losing my balance. No consciousness problem -- I'm not dizzy, not weak, just suddenly I'll realize I'm tipping and I put a foot out to stabilize and then go on. The only change is the increased colchicine and I couldn't find any losing-balance side effect for that, and the doctor said that wouldn't be it. It happened three times today, though (maybe because of the heat and humidity), so I called Advice. She talked to the Kaiser emergency doctor who said I had to go to the ER because I might be having a stroke. Two weeks is a really long time to have a stroke! And I have Peapod delivering food today and I would lose about $200 in food and penalties if I wasn't here when they arrived. So we agreed that I'd go to the ER as soon as I put the delivery away. I probably do need a phenobarb level, I haven't had that in a while, but I'd rather not pay $50 copay for it. If something exciting happens first, I'll call 911. Don't worry.